While we were in NYC we were able to attend a staff meeting with one of my regular blog readers and one of the people I found most amazing and most entertaining during our first trip to NYC back in December of 06. She sat at the same table with us during the Christmas Party and we laughed nearly the whole meal.
It was great to see her again and I was especially moved by the story she told us about her Mother's Day this year. I know I will mess up some details, but I need to share it because of her conclusion. Sorry, Danielle, if I screw it up, but, remember, you gave me permission to share.
Danielle has several children and this story is about two of her daughters (and I'm not sure if that word is used to describe foster daughters or adopted daughters or daughters who used to be foster daughters or friends of former foster daughters or what, but that is how Danielle's life is. She has a collection of teenagers and young adults who she has claimed that live in and out of her house).
Last year these two were apparently determined to make it home for Mother's Day. So, at some point in the evening, they got on the subway to return home. However, they were drunk, and so they fell asleep and missed their stop. They called home about 3:30 a.m. "Mom, can you come pick us up? We don't know where we are. We kinda fell asleep." Danielle instructed them to read the sign at the subway station to her and when she heard the place, she was not thrilled. It was at least a 45 minute drive from her home and in a very sophisticated upper class white neighborhood.
So, fearing for their safety, Danielle said, sit down, don't go anywhere, and act as normal as you can. Because both of these girls are very "butch" obviously lesbian girls of color, the warning was more than necessary in that neighborhood.
Danielle got up, drove the forty-five minutes and was relieved to find them safe. On the way home the girls said, "Mom, is it Mother's Day yet?"
"Yes, it's today."
"Can you drive us to 7-11 so we can buy you something?"
Daneille suggested to them that she'd rather just go back to bed if it was all the same to them. They went home, Danielle went back to bed, and when she woke up, the girls had gotten up early, headed to 7-11 on their own, and purchased some gifts for her.
Danielle ended her story, which was MUCH more hilarious coming from her and her NYC accent and awesome personality, with these words:
"What they didn't understand was, that for me, being a mother was not about flowers or gifts from 7-11. It was about them having someone to call at 3:30 a.m. when they really needed a mom."
Now I have tears in my eyes. Happy Mother's Day again to you, Danielle, and to all of you who became mothers not to fulfill your own needs, but to provide a mom to kids who needed one.