Thursday, November 27, 2008

One Day Gone but Trouble Brewing

Trouble is brewing for tomorrow. Salinda is not going to get her way like she wants it and so she is going to punish us. It has already started. The plan was always for her boyfriend to come back with us and have dinner here tomorrow until somehow they decided he didn't want to. Now she is desperate to get back up there and I explained to her that if he wasn't coming I was not going to leave the rest of the family to take her up to his house tomorrow. She's now regretting returning with us to have Thanksgiving with our family even though we all went up to her boyfriends for dinner to please her.

She is a perfectionist and cannot handle disappointment very well. It's frustrating when she is so mature 90% of the time that when she isn't getting what she wants she has such a fit. Tonight she went above and beyond the call of duty by helping in the kitchen but she did it silenty, with her hoodie over her head, earbuds in her ears, ignoring us. Even when she's doing something good she has to try to make people feel bad.

I'm not sure it's really very personal. She just really has not acquired the ability to get over disappointment without having a sullen fit. We will all do our best tomorrow to override her negativity, but it will be difficult.

At what age to girls acquire the ability to be gracious when not getting their way? Or is it a personality thing more than a maturity issue?

Those of you who are experts on teenage girls, what is it?


Angela :-) said...

As the oldest of four girls (all within five years), I'd have to say it's both. A combo of personality & maturity. Not that I'm an expert...

Angela :-)

Shari said...

I agree with Angela. My oldest is 18 and still struggles with being civil when very disappointed. My 15yo will make everyone miserable in the hopes that she'll get her way when told no.

From what I'm told, I'll most likely like them again once they hit their 20's :)

Meg an Aggie in Frisco said...

My mom might say.. never(I'm 36). :-) But I hear the mid 20's.