Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Drama from Afar

I'm finding it a bit hard to feel like I am away when I am kind of away but really not away because I have my phone and people text me. A lot.

The crisis this week include Salinda receiving news that the county where her boyfriends family lives has a policy that minor parents can only live in one of three places: 1) WIth their own parents; 2) with a relative of their own parents; or 3) when necessary, in foster care. However, they can get married (ugh) or, let someone else be her legal guardians. Salinda is all caught up on not keeping the baby away from the baby's dad and so she is determined not to live at home. We don't have a viable relative and foster care is unecessary. We aren't going to sign for her to get married. She simply said, "well, we have to figure something out, cuz I"m not taking the baby away from H**** (the boyfriend)." So we texted and came up with nothing yesterday. tough stuff.

John came to the point of going back to jail if he didn't come up with some money to pay for a court ordered activity. I have been telling him all year long to save his money to pay it, but of course he did not. So he is a few hundred away from going back to jail. Now of course we could let him go back to jail and spend the rest of his life as a registered sex offender, but instead we gave him the check. Why? Well, for many reasons, but one reason is that we gave Mike a similar check in the fall.

And now Mike is telling Bart he may not get out of jail on Monday as he originally thought. We had decided to offer him the chance to move home, requiring us to change several rooms around. Now I am unsure if we should make all those moves or not....

Regardless of all this, I enjoy my coworkers in Toledo. They are fun and engaging and we have a good time. Sometimes during the day I forget that I"m working in an office with people -- but meals are a good time. Last night the hotel had a soup judging contest reception and a few of the "gals" came by -- it was nice to visit, though I had left my phone in the room and was panicking about whether or not calls were coming in. See how twisted I have become?

The week is almost over. I'm finding it less fun being away this time for some reason. Maybe it's because the drama follows me anyway....



That is the way that our lives are going. Extend grace and mercy to one kid and you find yourself having to extend it to the next. It is as though they make us level out at the lowest spot for all of them, if that maes sense .... You did _____ this sibling who got that desperate, so now of course, you will do it for me. It's a crazy spot to be in.

6 comments:

Miz Kizzle said...

Can Salinda marry her boyfriend (I thought he was the baby's father?) or would that be impossible?

Claudia said...

She could marry him and would probably like to but there are a lot of things I haven't shared on the blog that convince me that they aren't ready for this step... and certainly shouldn't take it for convenience sake.

So right now we are not thinking that signing for them to get married is a good plan.....adn I certainly don't want to look back and know that I agreed to my daughter getting married at 17 when she wasn't really ready..

Cyndi said...

Maybe the boyfriends parents/parent could do foster care? I know this is a waste of money and resources but it may be the best answer here.

sarsmile said...

I don't understand why the county has any say whatsoever over where kids live, whether or not they have children of their own. Certainly as a minor her parents would have to give permission, which you have. If she were in foster care they could make those kinds of rules, and if they thought she was being neglected they could put her in foster care - but beyond that, how can they possibly make/enforce a rule like that? And whose interests is that supposed to serve?

Anonymous said...

I have to commend her for wanting the baby to be with both parents.

Miz Kizzle said...

Would it work if she were declared an emancipated minor? Obviously, you can't get it done by tomorrow, but if the judge or the powers that be could grant a continuance in order for you to get the paperwork done it might be an option.