This morning at the Y I gave myself a talking to about focusing on what is instead of what it WOULD be like, what it SHOULD be, what COULD be, or what MIGHT HAVE BEEN. Getting caught in the trap of focusing on those things can make a person downright miserable. Trust me, I've done it. More than once. A day.
Here are some examples:
I can focus on what it would be like if all my kids were straight A students who loved to read OR I can focus on the fact that for the first time in years all of my kids who have not yet finished High School are working towards that goal.
I can focus on the fact that half of my kids are overweight and should eat better, or I can focus on the fact that everyone is alive, fairly healthy, and able to be active.
I can focus on my own health and how it stinks to suddenly be taking multiple pills every day and what a pain it is having to go to the doctor every week to try and keep my blood thickness levels on target, or I can focus on the fact that I survived a very dangerous health scare six months ago, that my prognosis is good, and that i'm feeling better every day.
I can focus on the fact that my daughter has chosen a very hard life for herself in having a child at 17, or I can focus on how much fun I had watching Gabby interact with Gizmo our dog last night and seeing it make Salinda smile.
I can focus on the unwise choice John made in getting a girl pregnant within weeks of knowing her, or I can focus on how much we love her and how excited we are that their baby is growing, healthy, and coming in a month.
I can focus on the fact that many of my friends whose blogs I read live so far away and how much I would love it if they lived closer to me, or I can focus on and great it is that they post every day and that they are only a free cell phone call or an email away.
I can focus on the horrible faults of the Child Welfare system, or I can focus on the one-life-at-a-time impact I have had as I have seen one child after another find a permanent loving home with parents who have claimed them.
The list of ways I can shift my focus is endless. But your'e getting the picture.
So just for today I'm going to start focusing on what is AND rejoicing and being grateful for it. The what ifs, the might have beens, the woulds, shoulds, coulds, are all debilitating to say the least.
There are a million and one blessings for me to count today. So I think I'll lay the rest of the junk aside and just focus on them.
Do you have a need to reshift your focus? Want to share?