Tuesday, November 09, 2010

Attachment Disorder with God

I have been working on my next book -- only for about 45 minutes a day, often first thing in the morning -- either right before, or right after the Y (right before when I go later than 5!!!) And in writing one of the chapters yesterday I had a revelation.

I think many people have an attachment disorder when it comes to God. God had this plan God's people would be hands and feet, representative of God on earth. Problem? God's people are sinful, busted, broken, and messed up. It's sin that does that to people. And yet people look to them as they try to understand God.

And that's where the attachment disorder comes from. As children, teens, young adults we see that PEOPLE cannot be trusted. And these people are people who call themselves Christians. People who are supposed to know better. And so, like babies who are taken care of by inconsistent caregivers as infants, we conclude that we cannot trust. Problem? We conclude that we cannot trust GOD when really, it's just the people who have messed up. God is absolutely trustworthy, but somehow we've transferred our feelings of uncertainty about how they have behaved and what that means to conclude that God is who God claims to be.

If you are an adoptive parent you know all about attachment disorder. Do you see any of the same symptoms when it comes to your relationship with God? How much does the way that people have let us down affect how much we allow ourselves to trust God?

I know, I know, I could be opening a can of worms. But I really wonder if there isn't something to be pondered here...

9 comments:

Cindy said...

You're right on the money Honey

Rose Adoption Journey said...

yes!

tbirdonawire said...

You are really on to something here! I never thought of it in those terms even though I've lived with attachment issues regarding my children for almost 16 years now. Wow. Definitely something worth pondering!

Jill said...

Thanks Claudia You opened my eyes to something I think my mom was trying to explain to me but didn't receive it. When I was hurt by some people in our church I turned my angry on God also and haven't been trusting Him in any way shape or form. I know now that its not God that hurt me but the people that hurt me. I'm going through something in my life now that I really need to put my trust in God for and I think I'm ready to make that first step. Thanks for the hit in the head Claudia.

Kari said...

My husband (your maintenance man) comforted me through a really rough time several years ago by reminding me that we follow Christ, not Christians. He was right and your explanation further clarified some of the feelings I had then. Thank you. I can't wait to read your book even though I get most of your brilliant thoughts in person, too. ~Kari

Piano Safari said...

I've had attachment disorder with God for a long time. Yep, you are right. People mess up, so I blame God. How dumb is that? Like He wanted them to mess up. Free will is not so great sometimes.
Julie

Sunny said...

People have let me down plenty. But they are NOT God, will never be God and are NOT trustworthy and true. MY GOD IS! I never transfer the pain and suffering I feel from people to God, but rather run to Him for my shelter and refuge. He alone is my strength and is deserving of honor and glory.

That said, our pastor gave an interesting sermon on submission this past week. He said that how we submit to those in authority here on earth, is a reflection of how we truly submit to our heavenly Father. And at the base of our willingness to submit, is how much we trust those over us to take care of us. Now, chew on that awhile......

John Van Slooten said...

We are all RAD, until like a child we repent and learn to trust that God will take care of me and I don't need to worry (year 1: Mom will feed me when I cry) and to obey Him ( year 2: Don't touch the stove). All of the scriptures were written to teach us to trust and obey. As we do this over and over, we come to love God with all our hearts.

John Van Slooten said...

I totally agree with you. We are have RAD, until, like a child, we repent and learn to trust that God will take care of me and I don't need to worry (year 1: Mom will feed me when I cry) and to obey Him ( year 2: Don't touch the stove). All of the scriptures were written to teach us to trust and obey our Heavenly Father. As we do this over and over, we repent and come to love God with all our hearts and through the atonement of Christ, we are healed.