Today Kari and I went shopping. We had lunch at Barnes and Noble and I took a picture of a book called "B****, In praise of difficult women.. I was going to buy it for Bart, but I'm a preacher's wife so I couldn't. I can't even say the word. Unless I'm quoting someone. And I was going to quote it here but I can't even do that. Cuz I"m too pure.
Then we went to Catherine's (a very big lady store) to buy sweaters. Don't even ask me why. But when we got there Kari insisted on undressing the half woman on the hanger. She is so embarrassing. Then she went up to the counter and said, "WE couldn't get her clothes off" or something like that and I was all like, 'What's this WE busines?"
And all day long I kept talking to people about the weather. Saying exactly what every other silly Minnesotan has been saying all week. "Can you BELIEVE it's NOVEMBER? What LOVELY weather we're having!" Except that when I say it they look at me funny like i'm some kind of idiot, instead of a normal Minnesotan.
and this is precisely why nobody likes to go shopping with me and why my husband is secretely relieved when I don't feel well because then I don't go around town being all hyped up and stupid and embarrassing.
Undressing the mannequins, huh? I hope she put their clothes back on after she had her fun otherwise, some poorly paid drone at the Big Lady store had to do it.
ReplyDeleteMy friends and I used to do stuff like that before we grew breasts and discovered boys.
If it makes you feel any better, it's not even a decent book. I don't think I made it all the way through or if I did it was only out of spite.
ReplyDeleteOh I do that all the time if it's wearing the size I want. If they want my money that's what's gotta happen.
ReplyDelete"Except that when I say it they look at"
ReplyDeleteWhat?! What do they look at? I have to know!
Mary in TX
Sorry Mary, fixed it now.
ReplyDelete