Use Things, Love People

My children are very different from one another, but this weekend I was able to clearly see the difference between those who use things and love people and those who do the opposite.

Have you ever been used? It’s an awful, icky feeling isn’t it? Giving yourself wholeheartedly to a person or group of people believing that the relationship was mutual, and then finding out that it wasn’t — that you were simply being used by that person or group to further their own agenda. It feels pretty icky.

What I realized recently, though, is that it feels icky for the person who does the using as well. When I look at my children and see their lives, the ones who contribute to our family, honor their parents, and try hard to make a difference in the world, they are a WHOLE lot happier than the ones who do the opposite.

It seems to me that God created us to be fulfilled by doing the right thing. He programmed us, using computer language, to treat others well, to be grateful, to meet the needs of those around us, to be selfish. So when our sinful nature takes over and we do the opposite, that leads us to an empty existence that brings nothing but heartache.

Look at the people around you? Who are the ones that seem happiest? The ones who are constantly making the lives of those around them better, right?

So I concluded that BJ Thomas was right when he wrote, “loving things and using people only leads to misery” makes a whole lot of sense. But I used to think that was in reference to the people who were being used…. but parenting my kids has helped me to understand that the misery is often greater for those who use others than it is for the ones being used.

So, go out and love some people today. It's what you were created to do.