Sunday, June 03, 2012

Vowing to be Happier

Yesterday I was pretty sullen all day. I was going through attic stuff again and we got everything out of it and sorted. It was a very annoying task because in the past I have paid people -- adults, not children, (though they were my kids) to work in the attic. I had given them clear instructions. Sort out the clothes to be taken to goodwill. Throw away what is obviously trash. Keep aside things I need to go through to see if we want them. What they actually did was take a package of garbage bags upstairs and throw all of that stuff together into bags and toss them into another part of the attic. So yesterday I went through dozens of bags that were a mixture of keepsakes, important items, trash, and clothes that haven't fit anyone for ages and are way too out of style to be hand me downs. I tried to convince Wilson that the Jnco jeans that Kyle wore when he was 13 were still awesome, but he wouldn't buy it.

The results of our efforts this past week have been 740 pounds dropped off at the land fill and over 50 bags of clothes taken to the goodwill. Everyone needs to move every few years just to declutter. The interesting thing is I was previously proud that most of our house wasn't cluttered .. until I realized it was because all the clutter got thrown into the attic.

Last night as we were heading to dinner we heard from Sadie.... who asked if we were coming to pick her up for church this morning (a previous plan). I told her that I was waiting for her and that she never returned my calls after I found out she was missing. She said, "I'm not missing" which led me to assume she had come back to Job Corps. But no, she was with a Mankato friend who had a dead in the family and was in the Twin Cities preparing to leave from the airport this morning. Apparently she thought we were going to come somewhere else to pick her up. I encouraged her to call the center and let them know she was safe before they called the police. In the same series of texts that she's telling me to leave her alone and let her be independent she's asking me to call the center for her. I told her it was her mess and that we would be happy to pick her up today as we are going to be in the Cities to spend the day with us IF we were able to pick her up at Job Corps and they gave her permission to leave. She never texted back so I have no idea whether or not she called them or if she is going to call or text today asking for

Texts throughout the day and night from Tony saying the same thing. The program isn't for him but he's going to stay a month and try hard but yeah it's not for him so yeah. I finally told him to start texting me about other things because I had nothing more to say about that. I had repeated myself again and again that you can't decide about a place in a few days -- that it takes at least 3 weeks.

Texts from a very tired and frustrated Salinda took up some of my day -- she is really stuck in a difficult situation and working way too many hours...

We had a nice dinner out with our friends Tim, Sue and Sarah last night but I was so tired by that point I was almost comatose. I spent a lot of time sleeping last night and feel a bit more energetic today.

We are heading up to our new house today -- stopping to buy just a few things on the way. We are also going to be bringing some stuff up -- not sure exactly what yet but that is the plan.

I've vowed to be a bit happier today. I guess it wouldn't take much compared to yesterday. :-)

When I get tired it is really much more difficult to deal with the unnecessary drama created by stupid decisions made by my kids. I always see down the road, whereas they don't.... and then I get anxious.

So just for today I'm going to try to take things a day at a time and not get too far ahead of myself. Not sure I can, but I'm going to try!

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