The Day After the Night Before

Last night as I was walking in from church, the detention center called wanting medical consent to treat minor things that came up and insurance information (standard procedure). They said Salinda wanted to talk to me. She got on the phone and was very qiuet. I said, "they said you wanted to talk to me." "I only wanted to see how Sadie was."

Well, I forgot to mention last night that she made a huge scene of running through the house and sobbing in her birthsisters arms last night, getting Sadie all upset, but not bothering to say goodbye to anyone else in the house. Just one more way she's going to show us who she loves and who she doesn't.

Sadie was fine after she and I talked for a few minutes and by the time Salinda called she was skipping happily off to church. I told Salinda as much.

I tried to get her to talk to me, but basically she was feeling despondent and hopeless, unable to see any future, not believing in herself. I told her that whatever had been going on, that ostracizing God, her Dad and I was probably not her best bet, because we were the only ones who could really help her. She gets herself into a mess of some sort and then she hatefully treats us. I mentioned that it might not be in her best interest to continue to do that.

I am plagued by a little bit of guilt, even though I tell myself that it is not logical. She is very controlling of moods in our home, very manipulative. I feel bad for her -- because I think it is her emotional issues that cause this -- and I want her to live up to her potential. So I am going through some rethinking and regretting....

Call just came in from the Probation Officer. She is going to have a hearing at 1:30 and if she says she wants to come home, we will let her do so. We were enjoying the break in tension last night, that's for sure. Bart blogged about it. Not sure how much we want to let it all come back in, but we will do what we have to do.

I do not look forward to her return home nor what will follow. But we will take it one day at a time.