Trouble was Brewing and I Knew It

Salinda was pushing things. I knew she was going to keep pushing too. Refusing to speak to me, breaking rules, pushing everything to a confrontation. I was avoiding her as I knew that it wasn't going to go well. On the way home from school she stared at me disdainfully and refused to speak. I gave her a note listing consequences for her last violation.

Then I was attempting to work here and heard just one too many rap songs blaring through the house. I asked her to turn it down, she did, but then turned it back up. I tried to confiscate the radio. There was a struggle. She hit me. No that hard, but she definitely punched me in the arm.

Not going to happen. I'm not going to live like I did when John was here where people were going to punch me and not call law enforcement. Not going to set a precident where that is allowed to happen in this house. I called 911, officers came. She told her version of the story, including little barbs like "I should be able to hit people, if parents here can hit people." The officers, to their credit, said, "Parents, by law are allowed to use some physical force in order to get their children to comply."

I hope that I don't have to add here that we don't beat our children, but we don't. In fact, we seldom even touch them (except lovingly) unless we need to nudge them in the right direction. But she wanted to start talking about us bruising them, etc. The officers ignored her.

The officer asked me if I thought she needed to be taken in. I said that she didn't have to be if she could reasonably attempt to resolve things. She continued to argue. I told them to call her Probation Officer. The P.O. told them to take her to detention. She wasn't going to turn it around.

Then all the sudden she was ready to talk. Then she was ready to sob, and ask for forgiveness and beg not to go. But it was too late. She was saying, "Mom, you don't even know what is going on!" I pointed out that there was no way for me to know if she didn't tell me.

It's a difficult position to be in. I hate to watch my daughter racked with emotional pain not wanting to go back to a bad place. I hate to be the one, in her opinion, that "sent her there." But she refuses to allow us to help her. She can't stand being told no and not getting what she wants.

I have mixed feelings. I love my daughter. She has so much potential. But she starts to spiral when she is faced with a difficult situation and she refuses to let anyone help her until she goes way down a nasty road. And unfortunately, we don't know where this road will head right now.

Ahhh the joys.