Tuesday, August 31, 2010

The Definition of Goo and Whether or Not to Call the Cops

For those of you who recoiled at the thought of goo on your free copy of the book that you could have a chance to win at the Tackiest Blog Give Away Ever its' just Gatorade people. The pages all still open and it's really not disgusting at all. Kari is the one who coined the term "Fletcher Goo" and I shouldn't have quoted you. Now all you neat freaks are afraid of the goo. Sigh. But anyway, you can still enter for a few days.... so go for it.

Last night Tony and JImmy got into a fairly scary fight. Bart took Dominyk to his Jr. High Orientation, earning him some big points to be used later (Bart, not Dominyk). Jimmy is pushing 6'3" and weighs about 230. Tony is only 5'9" but must weigh about 260. There was no way I was going to attempt to get in the middle of that. I sat at my desk and told them that they needed to work it out or I would have to call the cops.

Tony was over the edge angry and decided that he wanted the cops called. In his mind he was completely innocent and Jimmy needed to be arrested. So he came down and insisted that I call them. At this point the fight was no longer happening because Tony was downstairs with me so I suggested we might not need them. He then directed his fury at me, throwing the phone at me and punching walls, etc. insisting that I call the cops. I tried to talk him down, but since he could not get it under control he went back up and attacked Jimmy again.

Fortunately Bart came in right about then and was able to get Tony to listen to him and head to his room. I was surprised that this has become so routine that my blood pressure didn't even go up. We have in the past tried the "call the cops" option and it doesn't always result in anything good for the kids or for us, but sometimes we still realize we may have to do it.

What about everyone else? At what point do you call law enforcement? Is it different if two kids of similar size are having it out than if a parent or a younger child is the target? Is the damage to property more important than the stress of the coming months if law enforcement is called and then there is a CHIPS petition or court hearings, meetings, etc.?

2 comments:

Annystribe said...

Living in a small town, I have an advantage of knowing the police chief on a first named basis. I give the kids a choice.... stopping...calling the cops or heading to the psych hospital. We have done all three before with various kids, and the easy one still at home has "seen" what the others have all faced and knows that this Mom will follow through.

So all the various adventures with the authorities have helped me down the line with the youngers. One day she was heading to the point of no return...she was in the car already, we headed over to the police station and sat...and sat...and sat... for over two hours waiting..for her to cool down and our crisis meds to take hold... She fell asleep and we headed home and all was over. For me now the threat of them is all I need once they gain some brain control... During the middle of it, nothing works, but catching a thought during a rational moment. But for the most part the best thing is to catch everything before the "point of no return" with distraction, redirection and just separation BEFORE.

Babysitting a huge teenager always on guard for escalating moments and distraction and redirection. But somehow they learn from all this and in their twenties learn to control themselves, or they find themselves having he authorities do it for them... and the AHA moment...Mom and Dad were right afterall.

Miz Kizzle said...

Have you tried turning the garden hose on them? It works on my dogs. They're too big for me to separate them safely if they start to fight but just the threat of a soaking stops them cold.
I have personally called the police twice in my life: once to report a tree branch that had fallen across the road and once when I returned home and found the back door ajar. My two sons, while large and athletic, have never been violent. My daughter confines her fury when balked to stomping upstairs and slamming her door.