What Would You Want to Forget?

Yesterday a couple of the kids and Bart and I went to the movies and Bart gave in and saw a chick flick with me. We saw "The Vow" -- based on a true story where a woman is in a car accident and loses the last five years from her memory. She had changed so much in those five years that she barely recognized herself. Her husband, who she did not remember, had to choose what he was going to tell her about those five years.

I began to think about that. What if I woke up after a car accident to discover that the last thing I could remember was five years ago -- the year we moved to Mankato. I would not know my daughter-in-law, Christy. I wouldn't know that I was a grandmother. I wouldn't know Henry, or Courtney, or Tessa -- my kid's significant others. I wouldn't know Leon or Wilson or that they were my sons.

I would also not know about some of the mistakes that I made in the past five years, or the hard times we've been through. I would have to be filled in on those things. But I would also not be remembering all that I have learned about God and His grace. I would not ... as the very old song "Through It All" says -- know that God could solve the problems if I never had them.

Did I enjoy the ways I messed up? Did I enjoy the hard times that have brought me to where I am as a person? Certainly not. Am I a better person because of them? Definitely.

Because it was based on a true story -- just not some Nicholas Sparks novel -- it really made me think. The woman who had this happen to her never did regain her memory. She had to trust others to fill it in.

The bottom line, I guess, is that I am who I am today because of stuff that I often think I'd rather forget. I am more patient, more mature, more aware of God's goodness and grace, and less judgmental. The person I was five years ago would probably not even recognize or understand the things that I've been able to write over the past few years... because five years ago the person I was couldn't comprehend it.

And on a lighter note -- one more thing about that movie. If I woke up from a coma and a guy that looked like Channing Tatum said he was my husband, I would not require an explanation. I would just go with it. Just sayin....