Really? Because it isn't what I did.
Apparently I was an usual teenager. I told my parents the truth. I was where I said I was going to be. I worked two jobs, went to school, got As and Bs, saved money for college. The friends I chose were good ones. I knew if I never had my first ... cig, drink, pill, or joint that I would never get addicted so I didn't have one. I knew that saving myself sexually for marriage was the best choice, so I did it. i got along well with my parents, my siblings (well for the most part, they WERE my brothers), and most friends. I was involved in my youth group. I had Christian friends at school. I viewed high school as a stepping stone for life and knew that if I did what I was supposed to there, I could get to college where real life began.
But as I said, folks are telling me that wasn't typical. "Typical teenagers" sneak out. They lie to their parents. They have to experiment with all the bad stuff just to see what it's like. They do things specifically because their parents tell them not to.
So if I have seven of them living in my house, then my life is going to include that stuff and I need to get used to it.
And young adults -- what do they do? They ignore their parents until they need something for the most part. They ask for money, they take advantage of their parents, and they are short sited. Their lives are very small and they focus only on themselves.
And so if I have 5 of those, I can expect them to be doing that stuff as well.
And kids with kids? They ask their moms questions. They have needs that they can't meet for kids and they want grandparents to do something about that. They need free babysitting.
And so if I have 2 of those, I can expect that as well.
So it's no wonder that as the kids get older I'm getting busier. By the time they are all grown I will be holding the record for the most texts received by a 53 year old woman. Guaranteed.
3 comments:
I was just like you, Caudia!
I was too. One day my almost 18 yo dd was arguing with her sister. I told her to stop, she was being unreasonable and obnoxious. She accused me of always taking her sisters side (but, of course, since NOTHING was ever her fault) and said, "and you wonder why I want to move out!" like she was really getting me with that comment. HA! I immediately turned the tables on her and gave her a 10 min. talk about how I understood COMPLETELY why she would want to move out of a home where everyone was taken care of and held responsible for their actions, etc. and that when I was her age I was working 2 jobs, going to high school AND taking college classes at the local community college (dual enrollment), etc. She looked at me dead serious and said, "well, it was easy for you, you were already married to Dad". AUGH!!! I laughed so hard. I immediately texted my husband and asked him if he was aware I was still in high school when we married - we got quite the laugh out of that, but the sad part was, she had herself convinced that if she were only married, life would be easy. She moved out on her 18th b=day and married a guy within 2 months that she'd just met. Yep, life sure is easy for her now (not).
I don't care if other kids do this kind of stuff, it is just not acceptable to me. I didn't treat my parents like this and I don't expect to be treated (used) like this either. I'm not asking for the moon here, just respect and consideration.
I was like you, too, Claudia. Admittedly, I was invisible in high school, and afraid of the world. But mostly--I was afraid of my parents! LOL!
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