Thursday, October 06, 2011

Avoiding Drama

I'm still doing my best to not get drug into drama, but yesterday, once again, Salinda texts asking me to come get her, which I couldn't. Told her I might be able to try to come today but she said no - it needed to be yesterday and that she would find another ride. She promised to let me know if she was going to want me to come today.... but I heard nothing after that.

Got a call from John from one of his friend's mom's phone from a long time ago -- not sure who but that is how it was marked in my Iphone -- "John's Friends' Mom." He had a couple strange questions and offered no information. I asked no questions.

Right now I'm looking at the "cutest baby in the world" -- he's with us for the day. In two days we will be celebrating his first birthday!

So, we never did hear back from the social worker for the 16 year old boy and it has been three weeks today. I was thinking about sending this email to her. Let me know what you think.

Dear _______,

My email has not been reliable for the past few weeks, so please forgive me if you have contacted me and I have not responded.

I thought maybe you would appreciate this joke.

There are two kinds of people in the world. Those who need closure and...


Anonymous said...

I'm not sure if I've commented on the wait beyond my initial comment because my phone does not like me commenting on blogger blogs usually.

Anyhoo, in my experience, which is ONLY adopting kids from MN, this is the norm. Except when we adopted through our boys' tribe, I got mostly no response on every kid we submitted our homestudy on. A lot of those kids are still waiting for families six years later. I wish I was kidding. I can see why we wouldn't be selected for some of the kids (example: kid, supposedly, wants to be in a religious family or wants to be in a family that is of the same race) but for most of the kids that are still waiting there is no obvious reason. I can only speculate, but my speculation continuously leads me to believe that some workers believe that some kids are better off in foster care than in a permanent family.

I come at this perspective from my experience when it took us six months to get our daughter home from a MN county & we had to bring in a state mediator to get it done. The GAL lied, her SW lied, & the judge was just clueless because he was listening to these people that were submitting false court reports (we also had to report this to the GAL central office & the county supervisor, etc).

That entire experience was why I was hellbent on examining the MN foster care to permanency "system" or lack thereof.

Definitely follow up. It might be the only way you know anything at all. And who knows, you might be "picked". It took us two entire months just to get a first visit arranged, then 6 months after to be "picked" for our daughter. No one else submitted a homestudy. Her worker simply thought she was too disabled or difficult to be adopted.

(I won't even talk about the other 24 kids we never heard back on)

I also have my own nosy questions, like what county and who is the worker and etc. but those are none of my business...just my desire to compare notes & look for similarities.

Kelli said...

Your email to the social worker got a chuckle out of me! Have fun celebrating the baby's birthday this weekend. :)

QueenB said...

Sheesh, Claudia, you didn't finish what you were saying....what other kind of people are there? It's really bugging me, not knowing, can you tell us on your next post, cause really, it's terrible to get part of the story, and not know the rest....

Piano Safari said...

Just a thought. Maybe people comment less on your blog now because they use Google Reader? That's how I read all my blogs, and it's pretty impossible to comment from there. Also I read it on my Iphone, and I'm not that great at having the patience to post a comment. Just a thought. Not sure how Blogger keeps track of visits when it is read in Reader? I love reading you blog, even when it is what you term a "boring post."!