Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Unexpected emotion

Last night we had to take John back to the ranch. He had a pretty good weekend and our other kids enjoyed being with him.

We had just finished a picnic in the park with a family who adopted a couple boys after meeting us (I go to help them adopt, it was way fun!). Their kids have been here three years and made a LOT of progress and hte parents have learned tons as well.

One of their sons and John have always gotten along well, and so they were having a great time. In fact, by the end of the night, everyone but Dominyk (and us adults of course) was playing football together, including the girls. It was interesting to note that when we came to this town 6 years ago and frequented the park nearly weekly, most of the kids were very content on the swings, slides, and other park equipment. Now they're organizing 5 on 5 football games.

So, John had a fun weekend and he did not want to go back. He convinced me to come into the cottage when we got back to help him carry his stuff. I had brought our ten year old and he helpd carry stuff as well. We got in and he put his stuff in his room and came to say goodbye. I was talking to some of the other boys and John came to hug me goodbye and just broke down and sobbed. He wouldn't let go from hugging me and I kept reassuring him that he could make it through and that he would be home soon enough, but it was very hard.

Tony saw him and just broke down as well. Tony's quite sensitive (in combination with his ODD, which is a unique mixture to say the least) and this just really hit him. As we drove home he said, "All those boys are so sad there."

We talked for a long time about how it made a big difference to have parents and to live in a home. Since he had cried the entire trip there (30 minutes) because I wasn't going to buy him a snack (you know -- the send our spending money to hurricane relief thing -- the way home was a great time to talk.

We talked about how not having a snack was not that big of a deal when you had a mom and a dad who loved you, a house to live in, plenty of clothes and food to eat, and the same bed to sleep in every night.

We also talked about how his behaviors and Johns at his age were very similar and that he was heading down the wrong path.

I don't know how much of it he got, but this morning was one of his best ever.

And John will be OK. He's doing well there.

And I'm emotionally exhausted, but otherwise, how can I complain? I have all of the above, 10 children I love, and school happens four times this week.

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