A few of the kids got fighting games for Christmas this year. In the past we have not allowed T-rated games, but since almost everyone is a teenager, we allowed some of them this year. A lot of them involve plots shooting and boxing and bad guys. They have some simulated violence and I had always heard that it was so bad for kids.
However, what if it has an opposite effect on kids with aggression issues? What if they are able to better with their aggression if they can box someone, wrestle someone, even shoot someone on a video game?
I have noticed that one of our sons has been much less aggressive since he started playing these games and I remember back to when Kyle first moved in. He purchased a few of these games for himself when he first moved in and was much less aggressive than some of our other kids who haven't been allowed to play them, even though he was just as angry or more angry.
I know I can't actually advocate the use of violent video games, but what is everyone else's experience with this?
8 comments:
What would concern me the most about them would be the fact that if you have a child who is lower functioning, would they be able to truly understand that if they try these things they would actually hurt someone? My DH sent me a link to a news article recently where a 16 and 17 yo were babysitting the 16 yo's 7 yo sister and killed the little girl doing "moves" they learned playing video games. The boy who killed her said he didn't think she would be seriously injured by something he just learned in a video game. The little girl apparently had begged him to stop hurting her and when asked why he didn't stop, he said he didn't remember her asking since he was too drunk. So....I guess your personal experience is probably a good indicator of how your particular kids will handle these games. I have a few boys (9 and 13) who really don't have the common sense to know the difference between hurting someone and just "showing them" what they can do. I would be worried about Wilson being so little and becoming a victim of one of the older kids. Please don't be offended by that - you know your kids way better than I do, someone who just reads your blog.
Well, as someone with an anxiety diosder, I know I get more anxious or easily startled if I watch violent movies, or read anything at crime library dot com. Not dangerously though.
We had an x-box and a playstation. When my boys played they became more agressive. The worse part is that they did not want to get off and give someone else a turn. They also have a hard time with completing their homework and such because they want to be on the games all the time. This is mostly my experience with two of my boys... one especially. We have three new boys and who knows maybe... well, not yet anyway.
-jen
Our experience with our birth and adoptive sons, and their friends, is that boys are naturally aggressive and protective. Our sons do play these "war games" (we ARE selective about which ones they play) and it doesn't seem to increase their tendencies towards aggression, but does seem to give them an outlet for it. They also spend a lot of time playing football and baseball, and playing with laser tag equipment. I have one son who tends to get edgy with anxiety after playing a lot, and with him it just takes an affirmation to rein him in. I noticed when reading Lisa's comments that the young man was drunk when he killed the little girl. I think that is probably more the issue than the games. Of course, there ARE some pretty horrific games out there, also, so you need to beware. For a long while we did not allow our sons to play video games, but realize that they really enjoy each other's company when playing, I know where they are, and figure that with common sense, this can be a good way to "burn off" some of that testosterone!
Our biggest problem hasn't been aggression overload but more of the competitiveness and selfishness that gets exhibited when they play games. We restrict games based on that more than anything.
I do know that our RAD therapist recommended never allowing violent games or movies because RAD kids tend to relish the blood and gore more -- it's that old adrenalin rush of discomfort that used to be their comfort zone. We have/do restrict those things, but as time has gone on, I see less and less effects from those things as the kids have adapted and felt more secure.
I find that a rousing game of soccer or basketball or a swim in the pool will decrease aggressiveness very effectively and it's much better for them than sitting around on their behinds. They always come in sweaty and exhausted, full of fresh air and good stories. This year I bought 8 hockey sticks for the older boys and their dad to go out and play boot hockey on the ice. I'd rather my boys be engaged in physical activity than a video game.
That said, we do have a few video games that the kids play on rare occasions. I find that any video game, violent or not, will 'zombie' them out to the point that they don't engage of much of anything else, including each other. Sure does keep the house quiet though.
Agreeing w/ Paula. I also find that these kiddos tend to "zone" out more easily than my biological children. They also have a heightened sense of sensuality and anger than my other children. We have a Wii gaming system, but very few games, and never violent or sensual.
I've come up w/ the same theory before. Not sure how I feel about it now.
Angela :-)
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