Jinx

Apparently if you blog something super positive it jinxes things. Sadie had this whopper of a meltdown today, complete with the nastiest looks and attitude I've seen coming of her in over a year. I'm fed up with the nastiness.

Then there is the whole "the easy ones go and hard ones stay." Bart and I have been too tired to do much this weekend -- just recovering from the last week of emotional bombardment. But the kids who are fairly "normal", whatever that means, can find fun things to do. They don't want to take the hard kids with them because they need a break from them, so they leave them here. And then unless we give them exactly what they want, they torture us with their obsessive demanding oppositional behavior until we can't take it any more.

That happened this afternoon. Four or five of the boys took off to go to the park and play baseball, leaving Tony and Dominyk here to do their thing. Fortunately, Dominyk fell asleep for a while, but Tony of course, refused to do what he was told. What should have been a quiet afternoon of rest turned into me being pushed to the end of myself.

I recognized a year or so ago that this is going to be the pattern for us. The "healthy, normal" children will go off and have a life. Having little need for us, they will contact us when they feel like. The ones who can't make it on their own will STAY FOREVER.

Sad but true. And if I sound bitter, resentful, and angry, it's because I am. For this moment. But I won't be in an hour or two. It just comes.... and goes.. with the territory.