And after three more solid hours of answering it...

I’m still only at 159. My deadline is looming and I don’t seem to be making much progress.

And I am sucking at the pulseless goal.... sucking at it.

These teenagers and their constant efforts to make ME feel responsible for the many many ways that they screw up in a given day. And the ridiculous things that come out of their mouths.

For example, “Maxx smiled and me today at school and I smiled back and we got written up for horseplay. I guess smiling is horseplay now.” (from John, who is trying to show us he is ready for public school. I explained that it wasn’t the teacher who had the problem defining horseplay).

Or, “All of the trash in the kitchen gets put there during the day while I’m at school.” That was courtesy of Mike. How could that possibly be true? If he thinks I’m spending one of my free minutes cleaning and filling up the trashcan while everyone is at school and I have uninterrupted time at my desk, then he is NUTS.“

Or, ”The reason I can’t get my homework done is because you are always at the computer.“ HELLO . We have two desktops for the kids, and two laptops that we often let them borrow. I don’t think that is why. It think it was the playstation marathon he played all weekend. That was courtesy of Rand.

And this was all in the last 1/2 hour. I feel lots of stress and I’m not sure exactly why... biorhythms? cycle? Deadlines at work I can’t meet? All of the stress of my upcoming surgery and the fact that I will NEVER eat AGAIN? Or the stress of knowing that we could get a call in the next six weeks saying we’re going to have to move? All of the above?