We are raised in a world where we all belive that everyone is responsible for their own behaviors. We are comfortable with the idea that everyone is doing what they are doing because they a) can control what they are doing; b) make a conscious decision to do what they are doing, c) understand what they are doing; c) know that what they are doing is right or wrong; and e) understand the consequences of what they are doing. Assuming those things are true we can easily say that people "get what they get" and deserve whatever happens to them.
Last night Mike, the one that a belongs to Kari, not the one who belongs to us, took Dominyk with him when he took his kids swimming. It was very nice of him as I came home exhausted from my trip. When he got home he had a big mark across his face and I asked him what happened. His answer was one word:
We had this discussion:
Me: "you know, Dominyk, it's not really her fault.
D: Yeah, I know. She has "alcohol syndrome".
Me: You mean, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.
Me; So you see, it's not really her fault.
D: Well it SHOULD be her fault.
We as parents of kids with FASD certainly have those thoughts at times. It is so hard to get our head around the fact that sometimes it really isn't their fault. And society simply cannot come to that conclusion.
The only disorder that is 100% preventable. That's the message that HAS to get out there.