Sunday, June 15, 2008

The Rest of the Story

I’m going to blog about my response to Salinda’s unbelievable outburst last night, even though i promised I wouldn’t, but I’m feeling proud of myself that not only did I hold my ground, but I actually slept afterwards, which is my indication that she did not completely get to me.

Having not done anything she promised to do if I let her stay “one more night” at her friends, and avoiding me all day long she, knowing she has an 11 o’clock curfew, came downstairs at 9:30 asking if she could go to a dance. I said no. She said, “I can’t understand why I can’t go.” I said, “Well, I don’t think there is anyone else in the world who would not understand that. You weren’t where you were supposed to be all night last night. You haven’t spoken to me all day. You didn’t mow the lawn. The answer is no and I’m not changing my mind.”

She had a complete fit that included intentionally pushing the door into me, hitting me once (though not hard), and was going to do it again until I said, “once more, and I’m calling 911.” She also managed to cuss Bart out and flip him off. He sat and calmly said, “NIce, Salinda” though I’m sure he wanted to toss her out the window.

She has these new no prescription contacts that are for color only that are orange with big pupils. They make her downright evil. As I was watching her freak out, I focused on one of those orange eyeballs and I almost started to laugh at the ridiculousness of our interchange. But I stopped myself from laughing. She was threatening to go anyway -- I simply said that that would be something else we could talk to the probation officer about if she made that choice.

She had a friend spending the night that I had gone to great lengths to get paperwork filled out to go on the Youth Group trip to the amusement park today. Long story, but the poor girl really wanted to go and Salinda had invited her so I made sure she got to go. The friend was spending the night. So she starts in on how she is NOT going to go the amusement park, and that I couldn’t make her go. Then I really wanted to laugh. Here’s a teenager threatening me that she is NOT going to go to an amusement park, all expenses paid, with one of her best friends. And this is supposed to affect me how? I simply told her that it was her choice and that she would pay us back for the ticket we bought her if she chose not to go.

I think they stayed here last night. They were certainly loud until after midnight. I guess when I go up to wake them in a few minutes I’ll discover if they are actually here or not.

She told me that she wasn’t grounded -- like it’s a choice. I informed her she was until further notice.

And she slammed the door and stormed out. And I actually went to bed and fell asleep.

Progress for Salinda? I don’t see it. Progress for me, definitely. I have had many coping skills to deal with her in the past that are no longer available to me or working, so I’m having to come up with new ones. And this time, I did pretty well.

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