Before beginning this response to a reader question, let me say that I have dropped off kids for the next-to-the-last-time this year this morning. Next week I will do it once and then be on my way to visit my parents. I also just returned from the YMCA to check my blood sugar and had the lowest since I started checking regularly in February.
I had a reader ask what I thought about medicating kids at age four and it took me back in time 8 years to about this time of year.
Dominyk was in special education preschool at the time and Wow, was he a handful. He’s 12 now and still, as I have been posting, cannot sit still or keep quiet, but at 4. Oh....my.....gooodness. He was a perpetual moving object.
Anyway, I was at the Fitness Center and I have no idea why, but I was using the fitness center phone to talk to his preschool teacher. Thinking then that Dominyk would always be our youngest, I knew that I was only months away from having all the kids in school all day everyday (we had all day every day kindergarten).
I remember the conversation well. She said, “Well, I have some bad news.”
I replied, “Dominyk can’t go to kindergarten without medication?”
“nope,” she replied. “Dominyk can’t go to kindergarten and has to repeat preschool AND he can’t come back to preschool without meds.”
And so we started Dominyk on medication. And before this, we did not believe in medicating children. I remember talking to another parent about her son and she said, ‘We finally decided to try medication because it didn’t seem like he had a very good life when all he did was get yelled at all the time.“
We tried medication and it has made a huge difference. However, even with 5 different medications, as I mentioned yesterday, he is still so far out of the realm of ”normal“ when it comes to self-regulation and impulse control that most people would be amazed if they lived with him on a daily basis.
But we have grown used to it over the years, and he has done better during some periods, and worse during others. His combination of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and his ADHD require a great deal more patience than I have some days. He literally can ask for something 100 or more times even if the answer is no every single time. It’s amazing that he can keep going like that. It’s like the energizer bunny on steroids.
I love this picture of Kyle reading to him in 2002. I am sure I was somehow paying Kyle to do it.... But they were waiting to go to the pool and of course, his swimming trunks belonged on his head.
We should have known we were in trouble when he was 18 months old and could barely talk.... Check out this movie of him ”making his food fall.“
2 comments:
One of our "regular" kids had to start ADHD meds at 4 years old. Among other things he is smart, defiant,and argumentative. He got kicked out of one daycare and nearly the second. The meds have made a huge difference. He is in a preschool now; the teachers love him and say he is the most polite child they have ever met. I am so glad he was able to start meds before kindergarten so he will begin his school career with a good reputation, not a bad one.
We went to a psychiatrist who knows our family, she believed us and started the meds when he was 4, he takes Focalin.
My 4yr old sounds so much like your Dominyk that it's a little scary (same name too but spelled Dominick).
He's obssessive and argumentative much of the time and sometimes when we read your posts about your son my sister and I say to each other "That sounds just like Nick!". He didn't walk until he was 19 months and didn't talk until after his second birthday. He learned to argue as soon as he learned to talk. He's been a screamer since about 4 months old. I've had him since one week old.
He too will ask repeatedly for something or repeat the same thing over and over until you want to just pull your ears off. He wiggles all the time and constantly drums on things and bumps into me...very clingy. He can be super sweet and he sure is funny but sometimes I think I'll go batty if I don't get a break from him because he talks, argues, and moves constantly. He is not on meds.
Thanks for your posts (and Bart's). We read faithfully!
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