Addicted to Moving

When John was home this weekend, we picked up on something that I think is a phenomenon experienced by many older kids in foster care.

There are some good things about moving every month or two. First of all, you can be the new kid. Lots of attention is given to the new kid. People want to make friends with the new guy. The new guy is cool.

Secondly, you can make up a whole new story after each move. Nobody knows you or your past, so you can recreate yourself with people who don't have a context to check on whether or not you are telling the truth.

Third, you can be a real player when you move a lot, especially if you can stay ahead of the truth catching up with you.

I saw a video a couple weeks ago with teens being interviewed who were in foster care. One of them used the phrase, "I guess I'm kind of addicted to moving." I think this is such an accurate statement.

Why stay in one place? Staying in one place means accountability. Staying in one place means relationships. Staying in one place means the scariest thing of all: The expectation of attaching to people who really care about you and are committed to you for life.

I wish there were more people out there who would consider giving older kids a chance. Living life without ever having to stay in one place does not create a healthy adult. Cindy, in this blog entry, explains the benefits of adopting older children.

Check it out and when you decide adopting a teenager is the way that you want to totally transform the life of one person, you know where I am.