Friday, December 30, 2005

Change in Plans

I had the whole day planned. Was going to take a few kids to visit my friend Michele, then do a home visit while they were there, go back and hang out with her for a while, and then come back home. Two hours each way, so the trip was going to take a day.

But the roads are icy and the family I was going to do a home visit for has a puking mom, so now the day is completely changed. The kids who were going with me have no plans and I have trouble getting work done surrounded by kids who have no plans, so I’m not sure what the day will hold. i would rather not try to spend the day here with each hour passing slowly, but with the roads the way they are, do I risk my sanity or my life?

John gets discharged today and we will begin a new era in our lives. In many ways I look forward to it, but I also am a little leary. Am not sure exactly how this is all going to play out and am not doing a very good job of living one day at a time like I told myself I would. I am concerned about each and every piece of it and can’t seem to calm myself.

I have got to change the tone of this blog lately. It’s whiny-ness is even starting to get to me.

1 comment:

processor said...

Does prayer help? "This too shall pass" has been a useful prayer for me during difficult times. Remembering that I have no real control, and giving it up to god also helps.

I really feel for you because I sense you are struggling with feelings I have struggled with in my life. I've had several hard life lessons that have helped me change. Hope you find an easier way!