In about 45 minutes I am going to leave to go back and do a send off for the conference participants. At this moment I have no idea what I am going to say.
I thought maybe if I sat down and tried to blog something profound, I might be able to share it with you and then use it in closing.
Tomorrow
Tomorrow morning I know I’ll get up and do it again.
Even if today there seemed to be no hope, that it appeared I wasn’t making a difference, I’ll get up and do it again.
Tomorrow I’ll find a moment of joy. I know there will be one, because today I found one, and I did yesterday, and last week, and last year. Every day there will be one.
Tomorrow I will kiss a face that will scowl at me, I will hug a child who has called me a name, I will provide for a child who can’t give anything in return, I will forgive a child who has not said they are sorry, and I will say “I love you to a child” doesn’t know how to love me back. I will do so tomorrow because I did so today, and yesterday, and the day before that, and because it is the right thing to do.
Tomorrow I will talk to one more professional who just doesn’t get it. I will speak to a teacher who thinks the chaos in my home is the reason my child can’t stand still. I will talk to a therapist who thinks that my family system is my child’s biggest issue. I will talk to a Sunday School teacher who is convinced my child can sit still if they try hard enough. And I will advocate for my children again tomorrow like I do every day, always instructing, always authentic, always working hard to help others understand.
Tomorrow I will put my own needs aside and focus on the needs of my children. I will go out in the cold to give teenagers a ride home when I’d rather sit by the fire. I will stay up a little later to help finish up a homework project when I’m tired and I want to go to bed. I will turn the other cheek, offer my sweatshirt after they’ve stolen my coat, and give up the last piece of cake because one of my kids wants it really really bad.
Tomorrow I will end my day tired and emotional spent. I will ask myself it is worth it and I will conclude that it is. I will go to bed determined that the next day will be better and promising myself that I will get up and do everything again the day after that.
Tomorrow I will encourage one more person to adopt a hurting child. Knowing what I do about parenting kids with a history of abuse and neglect and knowing how hard it is to do so, I will still ask another family to do what I am doing. I will sign them up to begin a journey similar to mine. I will convince them that just because something is really hard doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it.
And tomorrow one more child will wake up knowing where he belongs. One more child will go through their day with someone to call Mommy or Daddy. One more child will unpack for the last time. One more child will hear the words I love you even if they don’t understand what they mean. One more child will close the door to a past filled with hurt and anger and head towards a life of living with people who are committed to helping them heal.
I am to do all these things tomorrow, not because I am more wonderful or special than anyone else. And I realize that it will take many more tomorrows to heal all of the yesterdays. But I do it because I believe that as tomorrow leads to another tomorrow, and another tomorrow after that, that my consistency, my presence in the lives of my children, my persistence in parenting as well as I can, may lead to brighter tomorrows for them.
And some day, I believe we will all arrive at a tomorrow when we can look back with a sense of satisfaction. The heartache of our yesterdays will be dimmed, the frustrations of the past will be resolved, and what we have gained through our pain will make us better people. We will see a generational cycle broken and our children’s children having a better start.
Yes, tomorrow I’ll get up and do it all over again, no matter how hard today was. Because after we have lived through enough tomorrows we will one day see just a little piece of evidence that what we have done today was worth it.
I thought maybe if I sat down and tried to blog something profound, I might be able to share it with you and then use it in closing.
Tomorrow
Tomorrow morning I know I’ll get up and do it again.
Even if today there seemed to be no hope, that it appeared I wasn’t making a difference, I’ll get up and do it again.
Tomorrow I’ll find a moment of joy. I know there will be one, because today I found one, and I did yesterday, and last week, and last year. Every day there will be one.
Tomorrow I will kiss a face that will scowl at me, I will hug a child who has called me a name, I will provide for a child who can’t give anything in return, I will forgive a child who has not said they are sorry, and I will say “I love you to a child” doesn’t know how to love me back. I will do so tomorrow because I did so today, and yesterday, and the day before that, and because it is the right thing to do.
Tomorrow I will talk to one more professional who just doesn’t get it. I will speak to a teacher who thinks the chaos in my home is the reason my child can’t stand still. I will talk to a therapist who thinks that my family system is my child’s biggest issue. I will talk to a Sunday School teacher who is convinced my child can sit still if they try hard enough. And I will advocate for my children again tomorrow like I do every day, always instructing, always authentic, always working hard to help others understand.
Tomorrow I will put my own needs aside and focus on the needs of my children. I will go out in the cold to give teenagers a ride home when I’d rather sit by the fire. I will stay up a little later to help finish up a homework project when I’m tired and I want to go to bed. I will turn the other cheek, offer my sweatshirt after they’ve stolen my coat, and give up the last piece of cake because one of my kids wants it really really bad.
Tomorrow I will end my day tired and emotional spent. I will ask myself it is worth it and I will conclude that it is. I will go to bed determined that the next day will be better and promising myself that I will get up and do everything again the day after that.
Tomorrow I will encourage one more person to adopt a hurting child. Knowing what I do about parenting kids with a history of abuse and neglect and knowing how hard it is to do so, I will still ask another family to do what I am doing. I will sign them up to begin a journey similar to mine. I will convince them that just because something is really hard doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it.
And tomorrow one more child will wake up knowing where he belongs. One more child will go through their day with someone to call Mommy or Daddy. One more child will unpack for the last time. One more child will hear the words I love you even if they don’t understand what they mean. One more child will close the door to a past filled with hurt and anger and head towards a life of living with people who are committed to helping them heal.
I am to do all these things tomorrow, not because I am more wonderful or special than anyone else. And I realize that it will take many more tomorrows to heal all of the yesterdays. But I do it because I believe that as tomorrow leads to another tomorrow, and another tomorrow after that, that my consistency, my presence in the lives of my children, my persistence in parenting as well as I can, may lead to brighter tomorrows for them.
And some day, I believe we will all arrive at a tomorrow when we can look back with a sense of satisfaction. The heartache of our yesterdays will be dimmed, the frustrations of the past will be resolved, and what we have gained through our pain will make us better people. We will see a generational cycle broken and our children’s children having a better start.
Yes, tomorrow I’ll get up and do it all over again, no matter how hard today was. Because after we have lived through enough tomorrows we will one day see just a little piece of evidence that what we have done today was worth it.
1 comment:
Thank you, Claudia. After my evening tonight, I needed to read just what you posted.
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