I Can Change

For the last several months I have, truthfully, (as if you can't tell by reading my pathetic blog) been fairly discouraged. I have always been an overconfident person with the belief that "the higher the mountain, the better the climb." Nothing could get me down and I was consistently upbeat, positive and convinced I could do anything.

However, parenting all these hurting kids has thrown me (and my husband) for a loop. I realize that my personality is not tuned into being disengaged and not responding to their ODD circus. Nearly every therapy session has to point out how I am the problem. I get sucked in way too often.

Today we went to the mall and then to the YMCA. Since we had a guest along, I had to go in. (I had been planning to come home and take a nap). Since there was nothing else to do, I exercized and while doing so read a Woman's Day from cover to cover. Every article was filled with little tips on to how to be a better person, do things differently, make small changes.

And today, for these few minutes, I believe that I can change. I believe that I can make exercizing my way of life. I believe I can change my parenting. I believe I can do a better job as a wife, a mother, a housecleaner.

And it's nice to have that feeling every once and a while.....