Sunday, May 06, 2007

Consistently Projecting Feelings

Yesterday I learned where Mike might be. I simply asked one of the kids if they knew the person he is supposedly staying with, and the anger started pouring out all over the place.

When I finally got through over an hour of either silence or yelling at me, I discovered that the real problem was anger with Mike for everything he had put the family through, anger that nothing seemed to work, anger that he was messing up his life...

But that sure wasn't the way it had come out.

It came out as "you as parents are the problem" and "It's all your fault" yada yada yada.

Always the target. Always the problem. The role of the adoptive mom. Not a fun one, but the way it goes. Maybe it's true of all mom's, but I don't think with quite as much intensity.

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