Bart is taking a personal vacation. He is leaving today and will be gone a week. He is going and doing all kinds of things I don't care to do, so I not really wishing I could go with him as I know I'd ruin his trip.
BUT, I am sad he is leaving. I do okay without him, but it's a lot of work. The way we have things divided as far as responsibilities in our house isn't "normal." I work 2 jobs, he works one, but it is very full time. In addition, he does the grocery shopping, the cooking and a bulk of the cleaning. I do laundry on weekdays (and have kept up lately) and I take care of scheduling, appointments, therapy, psychiatrist, doctor visits, IEP meetings, school stuff, transportation to and from events.
WHen I go out of town I take care of everything ahead of time, but I can't ask him to cook all the meals ahead of time. SO when he leaves, I have to grocery shop, plan menus and cook. Every part of that is annoying to me.
But the biggest reason that I don't like it when he goes is that I miss him... not the things he does, but him. He is bright, funny, witty and can make me smile inside, even if not outside, almost every time. He has a different perspective than mine, and so we balance each other out. And, at night, just knowing he is with me here in the house makes me feel safe.
But I am committing myself not to whine too much and make him feel guilty and ruin his opportunity to see historical sites and attend a geneology conference with joy.
I know the week will be OK. I just need to take it one hour at a time. It is packed and busy, full of end of the year activities at school, soccer games, four eye appointments, 3 doctors appointments and 3 therapy appointments.... I am not worried about being bored.
Have a great time, honey!
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