Dominyk was playing “Extreme Stunts” and licked the wheel of his bicycle while the bike was moving.
He is wailing at my feet. “I need a new tongue. I can’t go on like this, Mom. (He’s got a cloth and is holding on to his tongue with the cloth.)
”I can’t go anywhere with my tongue like this. It hurts too bad. I will just yell wherever I go. I need a new tongue. OW! Mom, that’s all I need right now. I need a new tongue.“
“you can’t get a new tongue!”
“Someone can donate one to me.”
“LIke an organ donor?“
”Yeah.“
”I don’t think it works that way.“
”I need a new brain.“
”A new brain?“ (I ask as it is quite difficult to ascertain what he is saying while he is holding his tongue with a cloth and talking at the same time)
”Yes, because I’m so darn stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. OOOOOOW! OOOOOOW! AAAGH! I think I’m going to have to talk like this, he mumbles, with his tongue sticking out.“
”I have some good news and some bad news. My tongue stopped bleeding. That’s the good news. The bad news is my tongue is still hurting.“
”well, I’m sure it will start feeling better.“
”It’s already feeling better. In fact, my tastebuds have already grown back and I have regular spit. But my tongue is going to keep making me yell, off and on.“
And then the whole thing is over and he’s disappeared out of the office door.
He is wailing at my feet. “I need a new tongue. I can’t go on like this, Mom. (He’s got a cloth and is holding on to his tongue with the cloth.)
”I can’t go anywhere with my tongue like this. It hurts too bad. I will just yell wherever I go. I need a new tongue. OW! Mom, that’s all I need right now. I need a new tongue.“
“you can’t get a new tongue!”
“Someone can donate one to me.”
“LIke an organ donor?“
”Yeah.“
”I don’t think it works that way.“
”I need a new brain.“
”A new brain?“ (I ask as it is quite difficult to ascertain what he is saying while he is holding his tongue with a cloth and talking at the same time)
”Yes, because I’m so darn stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. OOOOOOW! OOOOOOW! AAAGH! I think I’m going to have to talk like this, he mumbles, with his tongue sticking out.“
”I have some good news and some bad news. My tongue stopped bleeding. That’s the good news. The bad news is my tongue is still hurting.“
”well, I’m sure it will start feeling better.“
”It’s already feeling better. In fact, my tastebuds have already grown back and I have regular spit. But my tongue is going to keep making me yell, off and on.“
And then the whole thing is over and he’s disappeared out of the office door.
1 comment:
Dominyk's tongue story is the funniest thing I've heard in a long time. Then again, since I'm afraid I will start crying if I stop laughing, I'm starting to think my sense of humor may be a little warped.
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