I called Mike's treatment center this morning and told them about his conversation with Bart last night.
The counselor advised us to practice tough love and not call or visit for a while. I found the whole thing strangely humerous.
After years of being criticized and blamed for our parenting style and being required to visit every weekend, now we're being told not to call or visit.
Tough love. I think we know how to do that, but I'm sure that's not how Mike's going to understand it all. He'll be the poor victim, once more screwed over by his unloving parents.
But once and a while it's nice to be able to say, "We were told not to call or visit."
We will set up a visit sometime next week for his 18th birthday. We've already made it there, but the truth that I have recently discovered and will begin to repeat again and again is this: Kids need parents much more AFTER they turn 18 than they do before then, which is why getting permanency for kids is the most important thing of all.
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