John was so agitated today he nearly drove me crazy. My first mistake was forgetting his meds because he slept so late. Then having nothing planned all day (except me getting ready for my trip and Bart doing laundry and cleaning) was a second mistake, giving him way too much unstructured time. He decided to use it getting the little kids all worked up and driving me nuts.
He was picking up all of the MIke language and arguing about everything. He insists that saying, “I’m going to a friend’s house -- I’ll be home at 9” is enough information. It’s not. Not in this house. Where you are, who you’ll be with, if parents will be home are not, etc. are all questions that must be answered. He responded with, “If I don’t come home are you going to kick me out too?”
Our discussion was less than productive. It is absolutely nuts the way he ALWAYS makes me regret doing anything special with or for him. Here we’re spending $500 to make it possible for him to spend a week with me at my parents, and the day before he can’t follow a simple request of mine no matter what. Each simple directive was met with 10-15 minutes of arguing.
Cindy would be saying “duh” about now, but I haven’t done as many older teens as she has.
I think my insanity that is based on my children’s mental illness is directly related to this fact: I keep expecting things to get better. I told myself, “Things will be better after court.” Then “Things will be better after his meeting saying he can go back to public school.” Then “Things will be better once he sees Mankato and the house, church, and school.” and “Things will be better if Mike isn’t here.”
But they aren’t. Nothing seems to resolve it.
Again, a resounding DUH. He has a mental illness. Situations aren’t going to change that fact. Get over it already, Claudia!
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