I used to feel like I was really good at a lot of things. I had some professional success and felt I did a pretty good job at maintaining a positive self-image as a single person. I was a bit of a workaholic but felt that I was competent at my various jobs and that for the most part I was doing the right thing.
The longer I parent the less like that I feel. I am not good at housekeeping, I can’t cook, and I make stupid mistakes about things. I just don’t seem to be doing anything right.
Today the repairman came for the washing machine. Apparently, the warrantee doesn’t cover tubs pierced by long nails. Now, I realize that all GOOD mothers check all pockets. I do sometimes, not all the time, and when I’m stressed and busy, I don’t often check them. Now I have to pay for my error -- $500+ in addition to the many loads that will be done at the laundromat between now and NEXT FRIDAY when the thing will be fixed.
I know that at this time of our lives, during his transition, that my husband needs to count on me to be at my best. And lately, I just keep doing things that are making the whole thing worse instead of better. I’m tired of letting my kids down and him down.
Wow, could I be any more pathetic?
The longer I parent the less like that I feel. I am not good at housekeeping, I can’t cook, and I make stupid mistakes about things. I just don’t seem to be doing anything right.
Today the repairman came for the washing machine. Apparently, the warrantee doesn’t cover tubs pierced by long nails. Now, I realize that all GOOD mothers check all pockets. I do sometimes, not all the time, and when I’m stressed and busy, I don’t often check them. Now I have to pay for my error -- $500+ in addition to the many loads that will be done at the laundromat between now and NEXT FRIDAY when the thing will be fixed.
I know that at this time of our lives, during his transition, that my husband needs to count on me to be at my best. And lately, I just keep doing things that are making the whole thing worse instead of better. I’m tired of letting my kids down and him down.
Wow, could I be any more pathetic?
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