Paula cannot tolerate a mess. Salinda can’t either. And visiting her very tidy house made her hate coming back here.
I explained to her that Paula had one part time job, I had two, and that I had less time to spend on housework. I reminded her that because I work so much, we have money for extras that Paula’s family doesn’t have money for -- and that everyone has different priorities. We ended up having a fairly decent conversation about how there are “good” and “bad” things about every family, but that everyone is responsibble for their own choices.
I also articulated a very important difference between our family and theirs. In our family the “healthy” kids, the ones without issues, are not examples of doing the right thing. They are the middle kids and they tend to point up and point down and say, if they don’t have to, I don’t have to. They insist that the others be forced to do what I expect them to do or they won’t do anything.
At Paula's I never heard someone say, "But ______ doesn't have to help." They just chipped in and got it done.
i commented to Salinda yesterday that if the healthier kids would be good role models instead of gravitating to the level of the least mentally healthy, that maybe together we could turn things around.
I am proud of the girls. They have totally risen to the challenge. Even Jimmy, John and Ricardo are catching on. And since I have a few that are not arguing with me constantly, I’m more motivated as well.
I don’t know how long it will last, but for now, it’s nice to have things tidy.
I explained to her that Paula had one part time job, I had two, and that I had less time to spend on housework. I reminded her that because I work so much, we have money for extras that Paula’s family doesn’t have money for -- and that everyone has different priorities. We ended up having a fairly decent conversation about how there are “good” and “bad” things about every family, but that everyone is responsibble for their own choices.
I also articulated a very important difference between our family and theirs. In our family the “healthy” kids, the ones without issues, are not examples of doing the right thing. They are the middle kids and they tend to point up and point down and say, if they don’t have to, I don’t have to. They insist that the others be forced to do what I expect them to do or they won’t do anything.
At Paula's I never heard someone say, "But ______ doesn't have to help." They just chipped in and got it done.
i commented to Salinda yesterday that if the healthier kids would be good role models instead of gravitating to the level of the least mentally healthy, that maybe together we could turn things around.
I am proud of the girls. They have totally risen to the challenge. Even Jimmy, John and Ricardo are catching on. And since I have a few that are not arguing with me constantly, I’m more motivated as well.
I don’t know how long it will last, but for now, it’s nice to have things tidy.
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