Friday, January 05, 2007

Having Friends


I have mentioned that over the past few weeks we have started spending time with a small, normal family that we met through church. We’ve had a great time with them and we really enjoy them.

They are all very nice people. The mom and I laugh a LOT together and always enjoy talking. We try to talk on the phone frequently.

My efforts to have a somewhat “normal” (if anything that I do is normal) friendship has been interesting. Kari and I are great friends but neither of us is normal and so it is perfectly fine if she and I have to sit and listen to each other talk to our kids or if we say “I gotta call you right back” and then don’t remember for hours. It’s OK if there is screaming in the background and our lives are both chaotic.

However, having a “normal” friend is showing me just how abnormal we are. She works at a job where she can’t be on the phone very much during the day and I can’t ever talk on the phone when my kids are around. Over the past few days I have had to call her back about 15 times just to get in 10 minutes of conversation. Someone will interrupt and insist on my attention (and nobody better comment that I can just teach them not to interrupt -- have you ever parented a kid with OCD who is obsessing with something? -- you just don’t teach them to wait until you’re done. Sorry. Doesn’t happen). Or, someone will beep in on the cell phone and since I need to answer it for emergencies, I do. Or there will be a fight I need to break up. Or someone will need something.

She’s patient and she likes me and thinks I’m worth it, but I can tell you that if I were her I’d be long gone. What would the point be in being friends with someone that took SO MUCH WORK just to talk to for 10 minutes.

I’m glad she thinks I’m worth it, but wow, I didn’t realize just how far away from normal we had come.

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