“Process” left a comment as to whether or not I needed someone to talk to. My husband said the same thing last night. I think it is kind of funny, because I usually only have one or two days each month where I feel a failure -- and on those two days, I do have people to talk to.
I have several “therapists” in my life. First of all, I have my husband who, whether he realizes it or not, listens, and when I need to rant that’s all I need him to do. Then I have several other adoptive moms that I call or email regularly who are always willing to listen. I also talk to my children’s therapist when I take them in.
And I have the blog.
The truth is, I know myself pretty well. I know that when I have those days, that I’ll feel better in the morning. My mother told me this when I was a teenager often and it was always true.
This morning, I’m fine. Gone are the feelings of uselessness, helplessness and frustration. Each morning is a new day.
It may be true that I don’t need to barf those days on the blog. I’m sure there are other people who have them and don’t blog them. But it is therapy for me.
So, all of you who are my therapists, thank you. And just know that, as always, joy, for me, comes in the morning.
2 comments:
I have to defend my profession: therapists aren't friends, and friends aren't therapists. Therapists don't just listen (I hope, that when you send your kids to therapy, that you expect that their therapists will do more than just listen to them!). A therapist who would listen to you simply "barf" endlessly would not be earning his/her fee. Therapists have advanced education and training (could your friends pass a licensing exam?) that they use to enable the client to CHANGE in the way that the client wants to, to meet the client's own goals. The relationship between therapist and client is not mutual and shouldn't be, because the relationship exists solely for the benefit of the client. People who say, "Why should I pay someone to be my friend" or "I don't need therapy, I have friends to talk to" completely miss the point. You may not want to be in therapy right now, and that's fine, but please know it is NOT something you can get from your husband or friends or blog audience instead.
I am saying nothing about your profession. I'm saying that I don't need therapy because I am getting what I need from other people. I know LOTS of people who benefit from therapy and if I ever think I need it, I won't hesitate to set it up.
In fact, I could pass a licensing exam and I have a master's in counseling myself and I believe that I know myself fairly well. If I had even 7 or 8 days a month where I feel like I did yesterday, I might consider it. But right now I only reach that point about once every month or two.
I am not offended that you, based on my blog, think I might need therapy. But I do hope you believe that there are folks who can needs met other ways, which was the point I was trying to make in this post.
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